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We have always tried not to make assumptions about our son who is now 15, but the assumptions and expectations of others often come into play. Thankfully he can speak for himself and does very well. He has no real major anxieties either. This post was scraped by mymedclinic. Thanks a lot for alerting me! What I am is a man with Asperger Syndrome who grew up with autism, who has also been a primary school teacher AND worked in special education with autistic students in all areas of the spectrum.

I have really enjoyed reading this article and have found it warm, friendly, very informative and thought provoking — thank you. Needs that not everyone else has. Treating your child as if they are the same as everyone else. As a fairly young child, I would hear my mom talk on the phone with friends an family about the son of a family friend who has Aspergers.

I was able to relate to this, and asked her if I had autism. At six years old, this terrified me, and I clammed up about my ability to relate to those with autism until my teens. My parents would always make it very clear to me that I was a bad child for struggling with life the way I did. I had meltdowns, shutdowns. I was told that I must always smile, and be quiet. This was confusing to me- I could only smile when I felt happy, and felt like smiling. Forcing a smile was difficult, and the results were never satisfactory to my father.

I was seen as being stubborn. Out of frustration, I would usually have a meltdown, and was told I was bad. My teachers adored me. But some still had problems with me. They felt that I was not at the maturity level that a 13 year old should be. In other words, my mom inferred to me that I needed to suck it up, and that having added difficulty meant absolutely nothing. Sometime around 17 years old, I revealed to my parents that I thought I had autism for the first time in over a decade.

However, my mom started to accept it more as time went on. She has even talked about it unprompted, and will relate things I do to autism. I feel like a lot of people have a very black and white view of autism. At home it becomes much more evident, even at nearly 20 years old I struggle to take care of myself on the level of a ten year old.

Autism was always a comforting label for me, at the time in life when I started to accept that this is who I am. As a child and young teen, I felt weird, bad, different. Gang up on me and pin me down to listen to me scream and cry. A freak. I hated myself. I suffered with horrible self-image until very recently, and I still struggle to this day.

When I started to learn about autism, it was a huge relief. That there were others like me. In fact, interesting side story that I will try to keep short- I apologize for my long-windedness I actually got to see the son of the family friend that made me start questioning if I had autism. I was We became best friends almost instantly, and later started to date. I have never been able to connect to someone on such a deep level.

I feel truly blessed to have him in my life. He explained to me many things I had already come to know. As I enter adulthood, things are slowly getting better for me, as I learn how to manage being autistic, and as others become more accepting of my situation.

Anyways, thank you for reading, if you have. I was able to relate to this article a lot, and intend to share it with my friends and family. You make very good points, and I am definitely adding your suggestion to the footnote list. I feel like I have been given his life because it is so close to my house. What can be done for severely autistic children?

The father just looks exhausted. I know how he feels! Perhaps someone can come and watch the young man for a few hours a day, so the dad can get out and get a break.

I sympathize with the young man too, but especially as parents get older, it is even more wearing on them. I love my husband. I hate his diabetes. I love my son. Thank you for a good article. You can wish individual symptoms and problems away without wishing your child was a completely different person. My autistic son is awesome, and his autistic brain is awesome. I love how enthralled he gets with learning lists of new information, and how he can give me lectures on the universe like a little scientist.

I love how serious he is, and how straightforwardly he sees the world, and how bluntly honest he can be. We all wish he could be happier and his life could be easier. If he is autistic, then autism IS who he is, not a disease that changed him.

Try this one. We agree on every point except that autism must always be present at birth and cannot ever be the result of something gone awry later. And I hope my comment made sense. A person loves trains because they love trains. They love dinosaurs because they love dinosaurs. These are their interests.

These are common interests for young children all over the world, in fact. When autistic children and adults have interests, we will often engage with them in a way that is influenced by our autism. I think if I were not autistic, for example, I would not have dozens of spreadsheets on my computer for my favorite games. Using spreadsheets is one of the ways I interact with and understand the things that I love! If I was not autistic, my love would probably show itself in a different way, but I would still love those games probably, because I think those games are fun.

This child likes trains because he is autistic and that is an autistic thing to like. I think the point being made here is that the way that the child enjoys trains might involve their autism. Their struggle at school might be caused in part by their difficulties stemming from autism. But he likes trains because he thinks trains are cool. He struggles with school because lots of children struggle with school, because school is hard. He has a personality and a reason to enjoy things or dislike things or struggle with things.

Sometimes when NT people describe everything in relation to autism it starts to sound like they think we are a collection of symptoms instead of a person. My babies deal with abuse from society on a daily basis and I fight daily to prevent the damage. And secondly, that pulling a child out of school because the school refuses to provide a safe environment is a very good decision — in my case, it may have saved my life. I have an autistic son who is 8.

He is highly verbal and also brilliant. I have tried to be open and honest about the subject of autism, without pushing conversations on him. However, he is clearly uncomfortable thinking or talking about it too much. What are your thoughts on bringing up the topic vs.

Any thoughts? Hi Saffi, First things first, really sorry about the delayed response! Absolutely including the positives! Again, this advice is given without me knowing your son, so please pick and choose the bits of this that work for you and him. Not to go into detail, she gave that a good try, but at age 21 I was finally allowed to go to college on a scholarship, already four years older than my classmates, which obliterated any chance of relating to my age group who were already seniors.

Because in childhood everyone had expected me to learn by osmosis and often remarked on my stubborn refusal to do so, it was my college friends who taught me table manners, how to cross a city street, how to use public transportation, how to go to a movie or a concert on my own, how to actually organize my homework and get assignments completed on time, even how to manage my living space and dress appropriately.

My employment was in order: English teacher, radio copywriter, habilitation supervisor at a sheltered workshop, and finally CAI computer programmer at a medical school. I left each of these jobs, not by my own choice, not because of job performance issues, but because of workplace social issues, finally retiring on disability when I finally began to practice fulltime what before had had to be only sidelines: folk music which had been my love since I was ten, and the more lucrative ghostwriting Despite everything, over the years, starting with college, life continued to get better.

I continued to learn how to be in the world while still preserving my own personality and interests. But some part of the puzzle was always missing. So this past year I began therapy. In all of the lovingly preserved photos of their baby through age 5, I appeared to be totally alone in a crowd. The therapist saw, as I had when I looked at the pictures during my Rehab Admin class on identifying anomolous conditions in photos of children, some sort of autistic in the making.

So we did some simple tests, not the battery for formal diagnosis, but just a few indicators. My parents had been so impressed with the little genius who had stood up in her crib on her first birthday and recited 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 But they never thought to check if I could count. They assumed that was the proof. So on the little questionaire they had assured the school that I could count and knew my alphabet, so was ready 4 months before my 6th birthday for first grade.

What I needed was for the teacher to put five marks beside the five, three marks beside the 3 and then count them to eight. Of course Piaget was unheard of then.

But the teacher had an answer for me. Because I knew intellectually that counting was the basis of everything numerical, but actual counting I had never learned to do. Every moment of those days rose up unbidden now and then in my grownup mind as vividly as the day it happened until the therapist and I finally laid it to rest in Finally, most of the trauma has been outed and named.

The flashbacks have actually stopped what a relief. Until I read this article this morning, I thought the next part of the journey would be to write a book that might be helpful But no. So thanks for this article. It has sent me off in a new and better direction. Thank you so much for sharing your story. Thank you for writing this. As someone who also has aspbergers syndrome-thank you!

My mom never actually said she hated autism but she has said she hated seeing me struggle like I have. Thank you for writing this article a friend shared it with me on Facebook , I found it both interesting and useful. As a high school teacher who has worked in several different countries, not a school year goes by without at least one student somewhere on the Autistic spectrum appearing in my class. I have genuinely enjoyed working with every single one of them.

A few years ago, one of my 14 year old students was finally diagnosed as having Aspergers and we were given a few pointers on how to make her feel more comfortable such as letting her doodle on a little sketch pad when she was feeling anxious , because she was certainly not enjoying school!. My ignorance about the layers of who she was as a person meant that my more strict reactions to her stroppiness and agitation made her feel that way!

I apologised to her and then we discussed ways in which we could communicate without others knowing that was her request , such as a signal when she was feeling particularly stressed, so she could go outside for a while to have a break.

That experience taught me an awful lot about how to deal with each student as a complete individual, and I think it has made me a better teacher. Thanks a lot for sharing. Very glad you had the opportunity to sort things out with her- I bet it helped her out a ton and like you said, it definitely would have made you a better teacher! Thanks for the compliments too. My son is mildly autistic. He has obsessions and verbal ticks, little concern for social niceties a violent temper and overwhelming desire to control everything and everyone.

That said, he is also more empathetic than I am, comes by his anxiety honestly most of my family suffer social anxiety. And is basically a very sweet 4 year old in a very agile strong sturdy 6 year old body. He goes to a private school that is specifically designed for autistic children and is making rapid progress.

Occasionally I might let his autism define him, but mostly it just seems to me it is a part of the wonder that he is. All my other kids grow up like kids do and pull away from me with age.

Thank you, thank you!! My darling son, age 7, was just recently diagnosed with Aspergers. Your words have soothed my heart!! My son is wonderfully loving and caring and compassionate. He is incredibly creative and intelligent. May God bless you always!! Haha, lovely words- thanks very much!

I have a 10yr old son with high functioning ASD. Like many others out there, I would never even consider taking anything away that makes him who he is. How quiet and rather boring our life would be without have the chance to see life from the perspective of a child on the spectrum or the enjoyment we get out of regularly being blown away by the humour and laughter he provides.

But most importantly, I know he would never want to loose any part of himself that is responsible for making him unique. He is totally aware of his autism and is so proud to be living his life on the spectrum. From day one I have discussed, taught and informed him of exactly what was going on and what it could all mean whilst assuring him he is and always will be totally awesome regardless of any diagnosis. So following his diagnosis when he was 8yrs old he was already so equipped with knowledge and many tools to place him in a position where he was comfortable to be himself and ready to accept his diagnoses.

Really though, what more could a mother want for her child than to know that they are proud to be exactly who the are. I think we should look at those who are autistic the way we would a person speaking a foreign language…not inferior or damaged or weird, just a different way of communicating…. I do not have an autistic child and am only an observer. However, I know of a family who has an autistic child and posted a photo of their child on the roof of their house on facebook.

Is this an accepted practice of children with autism? And is it something parents are allowed to encourage? Apparently he does it frequently. Thank you!!! I always suspected there was something else. I think your article hits the nail on the head!!

He is his own person and can make choices and that is what I tell him! This is not a Disability and I will not allow him to use it as a crutch. He will be a stronger person because he has to deal with more stress than other kids. Keep up the good work! I am 34 now and I feel my autism does not effect me as much when I was a kid, but I do know It still effects me socially.

Kids with autism now days I think have it allot easier cause autism is allot more known and been studied. When I was growing up as a kid, not allot was known about it.

I know I have always been allot more perceptive growing up and I am able to figure how to do things by looking at them. We are very intelligent and knowing likely we do not like doing bad things or even harming others. I know Kids will always still have a hard time with autism but it will get better as they get older. I was just lucky that I had a mother who spent allot of time learning about this when I was growing up, she fought hard with the schools I went too cause of the trouble I had in them.

Yes I was bullied as well in schools but I was just lucky to have a mother who fought like heck with the schools to make sure I was safe. To this day, I still consider myself to be very lucky in how I turned out and I do thank my mother for helping me.

I also hope my message will help parents of autistic kids to feel better about them. Just wanted to share my mind about this. Thanks for reading. I hate that word… I shared it on my Autimotive Facebook page.

I find parenting my teen with autism easy and fun. His personality and his autism are amazing. He too loves Sonic the hedgehog.

Thanks for this wonderful article. It not only gives me clarity in what to say, it gives me clarity of purpose— to challenge these damaging statements, each and every time I hear them. That would imply that left-handedness is BAD. So bad that it needs to be banished to the end of the sentence and kept as far away from me as possible. They are whatever THEY prefer to be called. Not what non-autistic people decide they should be called. She even wanted a second opinion which she got , and guess what?

I am still an aspie. Or define autism as problem with NT brains incapable of understanding anyone thinking differently to themselves.

I think that my mom might have grown up thinking that autism is bad too. One of the biggest issues I had growing up is my parents would force me to be social on their schedule. They wanted me to talk when I would be working on something in my brain and not on paper.

On the job, I can function with anything, but at home I would like to but able to act like who I am instead of putting on a facade. We travel my two off days… they are so much easier to deal with than my family.

I wish people knew what it is like to live in a world where understanding the actions of others is a gift not a right where there are few people I understand at an emotional level, even fewer who I call friends.

A world where I feel like an alien. I was told I was slow. School was easy but people were hard. May 9, Retrieved November 16, Saturday, December 13, Religion p. NewsBank Record Number: Available from the Houston Public Library website with a library card.

The Assyrian Journal. Retrieved August 19, She went on to study political science at the University of Illinois in Champaign, Illinois, where she was one of the founding members of the Assyrian Chaldean Syriac student movement. Borderless Magazine. Atour Sargon, the first Assyrian elected to the Lincolnwood board of trustees, has been a strong advocate of the campaign. Retrieved May 7, Department of Commerce, Patent and Trademark Office.

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What are your thoughts on bringing up the topic vs. Any thoughts? Hi Saffi, First things first, really sorry about the delayed response! Absolutely including the positives! Again, this advice is given without me knowing your son, so please pick and choose the bits of this that work for you and him.

Not to go into detail, she gave that a good try, but at age 21 I was finally allowed to go to college on a scholarship, already four years older than my classmates, which obliterated any chance of relating to my age group who were already seniors. Because in childhood everyone had expected me to learn by osmosis and often remarked on my stubborn refusal to do so, it was my college friends who taught me table manners, how to cross a city street, how to use public transportation, how to go to a movie or a concert on my own, how to actually organize my homework and get assignments completed on time, even how to manage my living space and dress appropriately.

My employment was in order: English teacher, radio copywriter, habilitation supervisor at a sheltered workshop, and finally CAI computer programmer at a medical school.

I left each of these jobs, not by my own choice, not because of job performance issues, but because of workplace social issues, finally retiring on disability when I finally began to practice fulltime what before had had to be only sidelines: folk music which had been my love since I was ten, and the more lucrative ghostwriting Despite everything, over the years, starting with college, life continued to get better.

I continued to learn how to be in the world while still preserving my own personality and interests.

But some part of the puzzle was always missing. So this past year I began therapy. In all of the lovingly preserved photos of their baby through age 5, I appeared to be totally alone in a crowd. The therapist saw, as I had when I looked at the pictures during my Rehab Admin class on identifying anomolous conditions in photos of children, some sort of autistic in the making.

So we did some simple tests, not the battery for formal diagnosis, but just a few indicators. My parents had been so impressed with the little genius who had stood up in her crib on her first birthday and recited 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 But they never thought to check if I could count. They assumed that was the proof.

So on the little questionaire they had assured the school that I could count and knew my alphabet, so was ready 4 months before my 6th birthday for first grade. What I needed was for the teacher to put five marks beside the five, three marks beside the 3 and then count them to eight.

Of course Piaget was unheard of then. But the teacher had an answer for me. Because I knew intellectually that counting was the basis of everything numerical, but actual counting I had never learned to do. Every moment of those days rose up unbidden now and then in my grownup mind as vividly as the day it happened until the therapist and I finally laid it to rest in Finally, most of the trauma has been outed and named. The flashbacks have actually stopped what a relief.

Until I read this article this morning, I thought the next part of the journey would be to write a book that might be helpful But no. So thanks for this article. It has sent me off in a new and better direction. Thank you so much for sharing your story.

Thank you for writing this. As someone who also has aspbergers syndrome-thank you! My mom never actually said she hated autism but she has said she hated seeing me struggle like I have. Thank you for writing this article a friend shared it with me on Facebook , I found it both interesting and useful. As a high school teacher who has worked in several different countries, not a school year goes by without at least one student somewhere on the Autistic spectrum appearing in my class.

I have genuinely enjoyed working with every single one of them. A few years ago, one of my 14 year old students was finally diagnosed as having Aspergers and we were given a few pointers on how to make her feel more comfortable such as letting her doodle on a little sketch pad when she was feeling anxious , because she was certainly not enjoying school!.

My ignorance about the layers of who she was as a person meant that my more strict reactions to her stroppiness and agitation made her feel that way! I apologised to her and then we discussed ways in which we could communicate without others knowing that was her request , such as a signal when she was feeling particularly stressed, so she could go outside for a while to have a break.

That experience taught me an awful lot about how to deal with each student as a complete individual, and I think it has made me a better teacher. Thanks a lot for sharing. Very glad you had the opportunity to sort things out with her- I bet it helped her out a ton and like you said, it definitely would have made you a better teacher!

Thanks for the compliments too. My son is mildly autistic. He has obsessions and verbal ticks, little concern for social niceties a violent temper and overwhelming desire to control everything and everyone. That said, he is also more empathetic than I am, comes by his anxiety honestly most of my family suffer social anxiety.

And is basically a very sweet 4 year old in a very agile strong sturdy 6 year old body. He goes to a private school that is specifically designed for autistic children and is making rapid progress. Occasionally I might let his autism define him, but mostly it just seems to me it is a part of the wonder that he is.

All my other kids grow up like kids do and pull away from me with age. Thank you, thank you!! My darling son, age 7, was just recently diagnosed with Aspergers. Your words have soothed my heart!! My son is wonderfully loving and caring and compassionate. He is incredibly creative and intelligent. May God bless you always!!

Haha, lovely words- thanks very much! I have a 10yr old son with high functioning ASD. Like many others out there, I would never even consider taking anything away that makes him who he is.

How quiet and rather boring our life would be without have the chance to see life from the perspective of a child on the spectrum or the enjoyment we get out of regularly being blown away by the humour and laughter he provides. But most importantly, I know he would never want to loose any part of himself that is responsible for making him unique. He is totally aware of his autism and is so proud to be living his life on the spectrum.

From day one I have discussed, taught and informed him of exactly what was going on and what it could all mean whilst assuring him he is and always will be totally awesome regardless of any diagnosis. So following his diagnosis when he was 8yrs old he was already so equipped with knowledge and many tools to place him in a position where he was comfortable to be himself and ready to accept his diagnoses.

Really though, what more could a mother want for her child than to know that they are proud to be exactly who the are. I think we should look at those who are autistic the way we would a person speaking a foreign language…not inferior or damaged or weird, just a different way of communicating…. I do not have an autistic child and am only an observer. However, I know of a family who has an autistic child and posted a photo of their child on the roof of their house on facebook.

Is this an accepted practice of children with autism? And is it something parents are allowed to encourage? Apparently he does it frequently.

Thank you!!! I always suspected there was something else. I think your article hits the nail on the head!! He is his own person and can make choices and that is what I tell him! This is not a Disability and I will not allow him to use it as a crutch. He will be a stronger person because he has to deal with more stress than other kids. Keep up the good work! I am 34 now and I feel my autism does not effect me as much when I was a kid, but I do know It still effects me socially.

Kids with autism now days I think have it allot easier cause autism is allot more known and been studied. When I was growing up as a kid, not allot was known about it. I know I have always been allot more perceptive growing up and I am able to figure how to do things by looking at them.

We are very intelligent and knowing likely we do not like doing bad things or even harming others. I know Kids will always still have a hard time with autism but it will get better as they get older. I was just lucky that I had a mother who spent allot of time learning about this when I was growing up, she fought hard with the schools I went too cause of the trouble I had in them. Yes I was bullied as well in schools but I was just lucky to have a mother who fought like heck with the schools to make sure I was safe.

To this day, I still consider myself to be very lucky in how I turned out and I do thank my mother for helping me. I also hope my message will help parents of autistic kids to feel better about them.

Just wanted to share my mind about this. Thanks for reading. I hate that word… I shared it on my Autimotive Facebook page. I find parenting my teen with autism easy and fun. His personality and his autism are amazing. He too loves Sonic the hedgehog. Thanks for this wonderful article.

It not only gives me clarity in what to say, it gives me clarity of purpose— to challenge these damaging statements, each and every time I hear them. That would imply that left-handedness is BAD. So bad that it needs to be banished to the end of the sentence and kept as far away from me as possible. They are whatever THEY prefer to be called. Not what non-autistic people decide they should be called.

She even wanted a second opinion which she got , and guess what? I am still an aspie. Or define autism as problem with NT brains incapable of understanding anyone thinking differently to themselves.

I think that my mom might have grown up thinking that autism is bad too. One of the biggest issues I had growing up is my parents would force me to be social on their schedule.

They wanted me to talk when I would be working on something in my brain and not on paper. On the job, I can function with anything, but at home I would like to but able to act like who I am instead of putting on a facade. We travel my two off days… they are so much easier to deal with than my family.

I wish people knew what it is like to live in a world where understanding the actions of others is a gift not a right where there are few people I understand at an emotional level, even fewer who I call friends.

A world where I feel like an alien. I was told I was slow. School was easy but people were hard. I still struggle with the social awkwardness.

They are brilliant and uniquely made in their mental design. One is an artist and another plays violin and studies water fowl. I wish I could have be nurtured and not tortured. Family support was worse than the bullies at school. Now I am the voice for them when they need it. We see things that others can not. It makes life very rich. This is such a good article, and I love all of the comments and sharing here.

I am so confused and concerned. I have heard that the usual treatments for anxiety and depression and other mental illnesses can work differently or even backfire in people with autism, however in my case, they helped me dramatically. I was an undiagnosed autistic until age 25 when I diagnosed myself, but I was diagnosed with depression at age 14 and likely had it long before that. Anxiety also has and continues to be a ubiquitous part of my life. As such, i was put on my meds long before discovering I am autistic.

As is extremely common in autistic girls because they are so under-diagnosed, your daughter likely does have anxiety and depression as well as autism — due to going undiagnosed with autism and the incredible and invisible stress that it puts on a person. The meds are a lot more often used to manage co-morbid conditions that occur due to coping with autism in our society or just happened to occur alongside it. Also I can provide you some direction to resources on female autism if you are interested.

This is such a useful post. Whether this article is serious or tongue in cheek, I agree that these are damaging things. We must learn as parents also with our children, even the neurotypical children will teach us a thing or two — even more so with kids on the spectrum. Do you have or know of any articles that go further into explaining 10 on your list? This is a particularly important topic for me. Sites for adult autistics constantly tell people that their autism DOES define their identity and personality.

A site for autistic adults is going to focus on discussing autism and how autism affects our day-to-day lives…the same way that a site about Star Trek is going to focus on Star Trek and how Star Trek has influenced, for example, other pieces of modern media, etc. A website for Christians is probably going to focus on their beliefs and how their beliefs affect and influence their lives.

The mistake is in assuming that this is the only site that autistic adults do or should visit or communicate on. We are all over the internet having various conversations about various parts of our lives. I think very few people in this world define themselves solely by one aspect of themselves.

But if this one aspect is the only thing you currently see on display, it is easy to mistakenly believe that this is the only thing that they think or care about, and this is more common in the age of the internet. Reading a blog by an autistic adult and seeing comments by autistic adults might give the impression that it is all about autism all of the time for this group of people — but the blog topic is autism.

Then they all sign off and go have dinner or watch their favorite movie, or they go on a forum to talk about the new book they are reading or their job that they love, and might not think about their autism at all, or they might think about it a great deal, depending on how big of a role it plays in their lives.

Again I am not sure which websites in particular you are thinking of, but as an autistic adult, I do read many sites for autistic adults, and I have never felt pressured by any of these sites to define myself by my autism. I am a person with many facets to myself and my existence, autism is a big part of me but not the only thing that I am. Thank you! But everything comes at a cost. Just a tragic mistake for this callous lot to bury.

Parents- if you really do love your autistic child, just say NO to antipsychotics. And report any doctor who believes it to be a good idea. But I have been abused by a an autistic child, I am her nany.

Abuse requires power. That child has no power over you. You could abuse them, but they cannot abuse you. Thank you for the read. Very eye opening. Saying its your autism when she asked…. So again, thank you? That is what neurotypicals need to remember: to use their words with a bit more care. Those who are different deserve acceptance and understanding. Worse than any bullying in school was the way my ex treated me once I was diagnosed, like it gave her an excuse to blame everything on Aspergers and stop treating me like a person she could love.

I am grateful to her and the therapist who first said I had Aspergers. Her loss, and I am better for it. Right on, bro. Let ignorant people stew in their own b. Lazy people abound I make some stereotypical assumptions here, but human nature is what it is and modern take-not-give culture is what it is.

Good luck and there are a few pitfalls that one should make sure not to make hinted at above , the rest is up to your own personal style. Often been hit just for saying something honest verbally. Lying and its myriad forms is what kills relationships dead. Personally I love touching a good woman, because she can be sure my meaning is not a lie and is pure.

I am saying that I hate to see my son struggle with every day situations, the same way I hate my anxiety when I struggle every day to get ready for work rather than hide under my blankets.

Please remember, this is honest and heartfelt. I intend no insult or disrespect to anyone. I agree. I would want my child to be able to take care of himself when I die. This is what parents are talking about when they say they would cure it if they could.

Of your child is a savant, great! High functioning ones and their parents do not speak for all autistics and espexespec the ones who severely struggle. This is a very helpful article. I get what you are saying in number 2 about personality not being autism. But the colleague you quoted that asked if you were stressed as things were out of your routine, well to me that sounds like they were trying to understand. Had learned a bit about autism and were attempting to be supportive.

When others that are attempting to be aware see comments like this in articles, I think it can have a negative effect as they then think why bother trying? Your colleague managed to annoy you even though they were trying to understand. Kinda damned if you do, damned if you dont. So I wish articles like this would point out that you understand someone was trying to be supportive, even if they got it wrong… otherwise it sounds like you dont appreciate people even making the effort.

If I could take away the anxiety I definitely would. Heck, if I could take away the teenage hormone issues I would! My son could identify and comprehend 6 digit numbers in kindergarten while the rest of the kids were learning to successfully count to 20! He just showed me a new build last night! He had a hard time with fine motor skills until he found his love for legos; he honed those motor skills himself by building with the tiniest lego pieces available!

His Autism is a pretty awesome part of who he is. My oldest found those friends in 5th grade and it made a huge impact in his life. My husband and I privately share pics sometimes in pride of seeing his social accomplishments because we see him growing into a fine young man with good friends who support him for who he is. Yes, my daughter loves her daughter. She would die for her. And not just that. Everyone is different, and every One who has autism is different.

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